Prolia: The Commercial (All Lies!) And My Parody (The Truth!)

Vivian Goldschmidt, MA Drugs

Evidence-Based
6 min Read
prolia commercial satire

Big Pharma is at it again. A well-known actress – you might know her from the acclaimed sitcom Will and Grace – sings the praises of an osteoporosis drug in a TV commercial.

If a glamorous celebrity promotes a product, then it must be good, right? Wrong! While Blythe Danner is a talented actress and probably a lovely person, her endorsement of Prolia, Amgen’s injectable drug, is not a heartfelt, well-researched position; she’s simply reading a carefully crafted script.

So I’ve written a farcical script of my own, which unlike the actual TV ad, reveals the truth about Prolia.

But first, let’s take a look at …

The Prolia Commercial

You may have already seen the commercial featuring Blythe Danner strolling confidently through an outdoor farmer’s market, buying various wares and closely inspecting and cradling a fragile glass ornament. She even climbs joyfully into a hay wagon, talking and laughing with others.

If you haven’t seen it yet, here it is:

The actress says:

“If you have post-menopausal osteoporosis and a high risk for fractures, I can tell you Prolia is proven to protect bones from fracture. But the real proof? My doctor said Prolia helped my bones get stronger. Are your bones getting stronger?”

If I Were Writing And Directing The Ad, It Would Go Something Like This…

My version of the Prolia commercial opens with Blythe Danner strolling into an open-air farmer’s market, her long summer dress blowing behind her in the breeze. There’s upbeat, energizing music playing in the background, enhancing the bright, sunny day. She turns to the camera and smiles, as if you’ve just walked up to her, and says:

“Hello! Would you like to know what I’m doing? Believe it or not, I’m shopping to make my bones stronger! Come along, I’ll show you.”

Blythe turns and keeps walking, and the scene cuts to one of the vendor stalls, where she’s tucking some fresh tomatoes into her shopping bag. She looks directly into the camera and says:

“If you’ve been diagnosed with osteoporosis, your doctor may have prescribed the twice-yearly injectable drug Prolia. I know mine did. You see, I wanted to avoid bisphosphonates, and I thought Prolia was different, but now I know I was wrong.”

She then turns and walks to another stall, chatting and smiling at various shoppers along the way.

As she heads for the bins of fresh kale, she says:

“When my doctor saw my bone scan results showing I had osteoporosis, she wrote me a prescription for the twice-a-year Prolia injection. She told me I was facing painful fractures, pain, and incapacitation if I didn’t take the medicine. I was petrified!”

The scene cuts to Ms. Danner walking around the market, fresh kale poking from the top of her shopping bag. Then a series of quick clips show her selecting apples, broccoli, and green beans. She sits down on a bench as the activity of the market fades behind her.

Once again, she addresses the audience:

“Thankfully, I didn’t listen to my doctor, and set out to find the truth about Prolia. I learned that it really isn’t that different from bisphosphonates such as Fosamax and Boniva. Prolia does the same thing bisphosphonates do, but using a different mechanism – basically stopping bones from remodeling the way nature intended. So instead of taking Prolia, I’ve decided to follow a drug-free path to prevent fractures, such as including bone-building, alkalizing foods in my diet.”

She leans closer to the camera and almost whispers

“My doctor barely warned me of Prolia's terrible side-effects, but I discovered them on my own.”

Then, Blythe sits back and explains:

“You see, Prolia tampers directly with your immune system, stopping a protein called RANKL from allowing certain immune cells to be converted into osteoclasts, the cells that remove old bone to make room for new bone. When old bone cells build up, a bone scan may show increased density, but dense bone made up of worn-out bone cells is a recipe for fracture. So Prolia doesn’t make your bones stronger; it actually makes them weaker!”

Now she turns and points to her grocery bag:

“This is what your bones need to get stronger – vitamin and antioxidant-rich fresh fruits and vegetables. They’re alkalizing and give your bones the nutrients they need to build and resist fracture, no matter your age. And I also love to shop at outdoor markets because I know how important sunlight is for strong bones. Just ask my daughter, Gwyneth, who avoided the sun and ended up with dangerously low Vitamin D levels when she was just 40 years old! I hope she continues with her commitment to get more sunlight, and stays away from Prolia and all other osteoporosis drugs.”

The camera pans out to reveal Gwyneth Paltrow smiling as she walks through the sunlight and makes her way to the bench where her mother is sitting. Blythe stands up with her shopping bag and joins her daughter. The two walk out of the market, chatting with vendors and shoppers as the camera slowly zooms out and a voiceover comes on to warn of the side effects:

“Do not take Prolia if you want your immune system to function properly. Prolia is not for you if you wish to avoid atypical femoral fractures, osteonecrosis of the jaw, skin rashes, severe pain in your muscles, bones, and joints, and low blood calcium. Avoid Prolia if you don’t want to be susceptible to severe infections that could require hospitalization.”

The scene fades to black, and a red warning label comes on the screen that states:

“WARNING: Prolia is a dangerous drug that can ruin your health and your life.”

It’s Too Bad This Is Just Fantasy.

You’ll never see the unvarnished truth presented in any ad for osteoporosis drugs! That’s because all osteoporosis drugs increase bone quantity at the expense of bone quality, despite the fact that research points to bone quality as a crucial factor in fracture resistance. And these osteoporosis drugs always carry the risk of side effects, some of them devastating and debilitating. Prolia is no exception.

The bottom line is, you don’t need dangerous drugs to build your bones. True fracture resistance and bone strength are achieved by supporting healthful bone remodeling through nutrition and exercise. This produces youthful, high-quality bone that’s resistant to fractures.

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The scientifically-backed, research-supported concept of bone quality over quantity is at the heart of the Osteoporosis Reversal Program. And that’s the truth!

Till next time,

vivian sig

Be sure to read our other osteoporosis drug ad parody titled Boniva: What If Sally Field Told The Truth?