Are You Scaring Yourself To Bone Loss? - Save Our Bones

“What will people think?” “What will they say?”

Most of us have asked ourselves similar questions at one time or another, especially if we’re contemplating choices that go against the mainstream. We may face criticism, misunderstanding, or outright rejection from others. That prospect can induce great fear and worry.

This post’s goal is to help you get rid of all traces of that worry.

I Know What It’s Like To Face Criticism For Thinking “Outside The Box”

Some people may find “going against the flow” so uncomfortable that they prefer to blend in with the mainstream. I realize this isn’t so with the Save Our Bones community – you know you’ve chosen the “road less traveled.”

I had to travel such a road to write the Program.

When I embarked on the Save Our Bones journey, I knew I was thinking in a way that was against the established ways and methods of managing osteoporosis. And I was prepared not only to think outside the box (we’ll take a look at how that phrase got started later), but to share my thoughts with everyone by writing the Program.

Talk about making oneself open to criticism!

I recognized that I needed to stand by the principles I’d formed during my research, and find a way to move forward without the fear and worry of what others would think.

And I’ve been able to….

Overcome The Fear Of Non-Conformity

If you’re following the Osteoporosis Reversal Program, then you’ve already developed your “bone health philosophy.” You’re aware of how this viewpoint keeps you grounded and confident in your choices to follow a drug-free way of getting rid of osteoporosis. You know you’re ‘different’ from the majority.

Undoubtedly, you’ve faced (or will face) criticism and skepticism from friends, family, co-workers, your doctor, and others.

That’s why I want to help you stay strong and believe in your health choices.

Just What “Box” Are We Thinking Outside Of?

I admit, I assumed this phrase meant you were simply expanding your mind and not letting it be “boxed in” by mainstream thinking. That’s part of it, but the origins of the phrase actually go back to a method of determining creativity that started in the 1970s.

Study subjects were asked to connect 9 dots, which were arranged in a square using only 4 straight lines, without picking up the pencil. The puzzle was solved when subjects realized their lines would have to go outside the square (or box) in order to connect all the dots. Only 20% of the participants were able to “think outside the box” to solve the puzzle!

The Effects Of Fear On Your Bones

Fear and worry are not just uncomfortable. These emotions can actually harm your bones.

When you experience fear and worry over the long term, it is very stressful. Chronic stress causes your body to release stress hormones (such as cortisol) continually into your bloodstream. Over time, high levels of cortisol decrease bone density.

So it’s important that when you refuse harmful osteoporosis drugs (here are the top 5 reasons why you should), you shouldn’t get stressed by worrying about what others think.

5 Ways You Can Overcome The Fear And Worry Of Unconventional Choices

I want to share some practical ways you can be confident in your choices to do what’s best for your health and your bones, even if it goes against the beliefs of mainstream medicine.

1. Acquire Knowledge

If someone questions your methods, choices, or beliefs, it’s unnerving if you don’t have an answer for them. Acquire all the information and knowledge you can about your choices, so you can answer the questions of skeptics. Not only will you be confident and have ready answers for your decisions, but you may inspire some “converts”!

2. Recognize The Value Of Uniqueness

Have you ever thought about why you want to be like others? Could it be because you admire their individuality and want to be like them? Ironically, that makes you a follower…not at all like that person you look up to, who is so admirable because he or she was not afraid to go against the mainstream.

To truly discover your individuality, you need to recognize the value of your unique personality, thoughts, and approach to life – and embrace them.

3. You Are Not Responsible For Others’ Opinions

People are responsible for their own thoughts and opinions, not you. It’s a tremendous relief when you realize you don’t have to get others to think the same way as you do. You are responsible for your own choices, but not for others’ reactions to those choices.

4. Think In Terms Of Positives

This is different from simple “positive thinking.” Thinking in positives means focusing on what you do want to accomplish rather than what you want to avoid.

For example, instead of thinking, “I don’t want my doctor to stop treating me if I choose to be drug free,” think, “I want to be drug-free, and I can choose another doctor if I want to.” You have to decide who you want to be, and determine to be comfortable with it.

5. You Really Don’t Know What Others Think

If you stop and consider it, you really have no way of knowing what people are thinking about you. Even if someone questions you, you can’t assume they are being critical. They may simply be curious. And if they are critical, remember: that’s not your problem. It’s theirs.

Ultimately, other people are the ones missing out if they refuse to think outside the box. Remember, you’re the one who is reaping all the bone-healthy benefits of taking the road less traveled. And please share your experiences with our community by leaving your comments below.

Be confident in your choices!

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  1. Carol

    I have been advised by a specialist in osteoporosis to take Prolia, I would like to know if there is research about its effects. I don’t like the fact that it lowers your immune system and your blood calcium levels.

    I was told I was at high risk for fractures. I am 69 years of age.

    I am aware of alkaline/acidic foods and I do weight bearing exercise. Is this enough to turn things around? Is there anything else I should be doing? I know I need to reduce my stress levels.

    I need to check out the recipes section Vivian has, I need more discipline about what I eat.


  2. John

    bought the Save our Bones program in mid to late December 2013. February 2013 I was diagnosed with
    osteoporosis with a T Score of -3.4 in the femoral neck and a T Score of 1.9 in the L2,3,4. I simply could
    not tolerate Fosamax in any form so the only alternative was to attempt to do it on my own. Nothing fell
    from the sky and over a ten day period I discovered enough information to design a plan of action to at least try hold my own and hopefully gain “something”. Generally speaking I am in good health but with issues of chronic (and severe) bronchitis caused by exposure to Beryllium 45 years ago as well as controllable hypertension. The bronchitis is also a factor in the
    bone issue. The plan in broad terms was proper diet (both content and acid/alkline balance), supplements to
    balance diet deficiencies of magnesium, calcium K3 and D3 calculated on a daily menu basis, and
    exercise. This together with determination and patience produced these results on a dexa scan a week ago:

    T Score left femoral -2.5 and right femoral -2.8 both improved from the original -3.4. T Score for L2,3, 4
    an average of -1.5 down from the original -1.9. This puts me in the normal for my age category (74).

    The Summary of the report reads:
    “Lumbar spine bone mineral density is osteopenic, bilateral femoral neck bone mineral density severely
    osteopenic-borderline osteoporotic.”

    I am not out of the woods but I certainly can see a clearing in the trees. By no means is this struggle over for me,even if the future holds only maintaining what I have gained. Today, I feel as if I can survive a
    break whereas a year ago that would have been catestrophic.

    Cleary, Ms Vivian’s book would have been very helpful when I started this path and it did become helpful in auditing what I had organized. In the way of constructive criticism, it is female centric as is almost every word written on the subject. Even my DEXA report classifies me as “post menapausal” and compares me to a healthy 25 year old female.

    I have amassed a substantial library of books on the subject and few are really helpful. Many have not so hidden agendas such as vegan promotion (lots of soy recipes), radical enviro (locally produced ……) and the reclassification of alkaline good to acid food simply because it was not “organic”. Much of that doesn’t help build bones and actually detracts from the task at hand.

    I do have to say that Ms Vivian has a fire in her belly so to speak to help not only herself but those of use that suffer this disorder.

  3. Ms. L. Carmel

    Hi! Vivian,

    Thank You Very Much On The Wonderful Advice You Gave Us On, Overcoming Our Fear Of Non-Conformity!

    As Always, I Hope You And Your Family Are Doing Well. I’m Just Getting Over A Bad Spring Cold, But Otherwise I’m Fine, And My Family Is Doing Fine Also!


  4. Olive

    Hi Vivian
    I’m glad you’ve come back to me – I’ve missed all your emails lately. Thanks for sharing all your research and practical tips for bone health

  5. LINDA

    Can someone please answer me concerning if I should be taking the strontium boost or the algeacal with strontium or no strontium at all. I got my osteocal from a reccomendation on this site so I wasnt sure if Vivian wants us to take the osteocal with strontium boost or not. I dont want to mess this up. I want to get well.

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Linda, I don’t recommend additional strontium supplements, but the very small amount that occurs naturally in algae-based calcium supplements is not a problem. 🙂 You can read more about strontium and why I don’t recommend it here:

      • Linda

        Thank you !

  6. Jan

    Thank you so much Vivian, You give me so much inspiration. About 9 months ago I had a dexa scan and was – 3.1, I am 67, very slim and my mother had osteporosis. I was immediately put on Alendronic acid. I took 3 weekly tablets and felt really ill, I very nearly had a driving accident because I felt so bad. I discovered your site and stopped taking drugs and started your diet (I have to be careful to keep my weight up though so sometimes stray off a bit!), do dencersise exercises and take extra calcium citrate, vit K2 etc. I had been taking vitamin D3 for years already. I have a son with Aspergers, now realise how stressed I was, never associated that with bone loss. Also was on high doses of acid reflux meds, have reduced that markedly, again didn’t realise that was contributing to bone loss. I feel so much better, your emails and community keep me motivated to keep improving. Thank you again.

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Jan, thank you so much for that encouraging story! Did you know I used to have acid reflux? Once I got on the Program, it disappeared! 🙂

  7. jean

    I have Graves disease, I was told not to consume foods with iodine. Since Algae Cal is plant food, can I take them or continue with my Calcium Citrate, with D3, magnesium and other minerals?

  8. Linda

    Boy did I need to hear all the wonderful success stories! I am so happy for you all and hope to join your ranks someday soon.Sometimes it is so depressing thinking about “what could happen” with osteoporosis. I started osteocal along with the ph diet. I am on 50mg of synthroid. Osteocal said that the chances of repairing my bone is not as probable as someone who is not on a prescription medication. Has anyone had success even while on a prescription med? Also, Osteocal wants you to take strontium plus. I dont take it becasue Vivian says she prefers us not to. Am I right Vivian? Thanks for all your research.

  9. Betty

    Hi to SOB’s community. I have been here for about a year and I am sad to report no improvement in my bone density. In fact after 2 yrs. without a test and two back traumas last year I have a very fragile back. My latest test in March put me in the high to very high risk for fracture and I am suffering with apprehension and some discomfort after standing too long and weakness in my body. I am wavering on what to do and you can bet that some people think I am crazy not to be on drugs. Acid reflux meds are a necessity for me and affect my bones I know. I take supplements for bones and try my best with your nutritional program. I am underweight as well.
    So discouraged and sometimes fearful that my bones will crumble if I don’t do something. Try to be active (Tai Chi, squats, walking, steps in the house in winter, exercises from Vivian, etc.

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Betty, I want to encourage you not to lose heart! You don’t mention whether you have the Program or not; but in the book, I write how bone density is just one aspect of bone health. The medical community focuses a great deal on DEXA scan scores so they can “quantify” your bone density, and therefore prescribe drugs according to that guideline. But chances are, if you’ve been following the Program for a year, your bones are in better shape than you realize!

    • Linda

      I know your fears. Sometimes they completely overwhelm me too. I am sorry for all you are going through. What is your dexa score? Hopefully Vivian will have some good advice for you. Chin UP! God Bless!

      • Betty

        Thanks Linda and Vivian. I need all the encouragement I can get right now. So many in this community inspire me with their fortitude even when they suffer fractures. The form is different this time for the reading and I left for vacation right after so haven’t had a discussion with anyone about it. On paper it says In 2 years I have lost 1 cm. in height. My hip density reading is minus 2.8 with a change percentage of minus 6.88 from previous test and my lumbar spine is minus 4.3 with a change percentage of minus 11.33. I will need to have a consultation with my doctor or osteoporosis clinic after I get home May 2. My age is 73.

      • Betty

        There are varying levels of GERD and for some it is severe. I am happy for those who can reduce their medications but when you can’t the threat is cancer of the esophagus. I have to take a 40 mg pill every day although I know some who need more.

  10. Gerri D.

    It is so good to read everyones experiences concerning their bone health. We have all been fed a line of goods from Dr.s,nurses etc. The only one (I am speaking for myself) who has guided me in the right direction concerning our bones ; is Vivian.
    I’ve spent many nights sleepless with worry listening to the Dr.s gloom and doom predictions to what was going to happen if I didn’t take these meds. Thank God I found this website.All my fears went away when I read all the information and read Vivians book. God Bless you Vivian !

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      I really, really appreciate your kind words, Gerri! I’m so glad to be a part of your life and to know that you’re no longer afraid of doing what you know is right for your bones, your health, and your mind 🙂

  11. janette lo

    I have been following the Saveourbones programme FOR OVER A YEAR NOW and hope to have made a difference to my osteoporosis.My last bone scan was -3.4 and I don’t know how serious that is in relation to my age 58 AND WEIGHT 55K.MY GP COULDN’T EXPLAIN THE T scale results to me so i just hope that next year I see a positive result.
    I really enjoy getting your email updates.
    thank you so much for giving me hope and an alternative to taking all the meds that the G.p prescribed !

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      You’re very welcome, Janette! And thanks for your kind words 🙂

  12. Margaret Sharpe

    AS Vivian knows, I’ve been approximately following her diet recommendatons and advice for many years, yet my bone density keeps going down.
    However, in April 2010 I cracked my pelvis (two hairline cracks) running on a wet floor. Possibly if I hadn’t had three dimensional wooden puzzles at my side when I fell,the pelvis might not have cracked (the puzzles didn’t!). After four weeks with wheel chair use everything was fine: I could walk, mini-jog in time, and no problems at all.Then in September 2013 I went to answer my phone (just having hopped out of the bath, slipped as I rounded the corner on a tiled floor and cracked the other side of the pelvis. I could still walk, but it took more than 2 months, plus some physiotherapy for it to heal. I occasionally have a little pain in that area, but I’m walking and mini-jogging and no-one would know I had ever cracked a bone. I am now 79. I had a lot of help diet wise and alternative medicine wise from Richard DiCenso also, and am in better health than I was some years back (though I was never aware that I was not healthy and full of energy) and have enrolled in a second PhD at the local university. No doubt the next bone scan may show weaker bones, but I don’t care. My bones heal fast if I do crack something.

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Great to hear from you, Margaret! And this is further proof that bone health is not only about density… Stay positive and active 🙂

  13. L.D.

    What good converstions and sharing!!!! in 2010 I had surgeries for cancer and was given a medicine to keep the cancer from coming back. I read the pamphlet as always but not one thing was said about “this will destroy your bones”. Handy I would say. Also didnt mention heart complications which I now have as well as 6 compression fractures. I have PT, and using all I can from Save Our Bones program and, I added Comfrey oil which is applied each morning to hasten the healing. Orthopedic Surgeon said I needed Forteo for 2yrs then Prolia for the remainder of my life. Not!!!! At my age of 68 I almost bought the sales pitch. Thought how much longer do I really have and if my bones can be healed fast why not? DUH!!! 21 months before the Forteo would rebuild at $500+ per month.. Sure I can afford that, No Way!!!! I follow the program have added a couple of things from my PT and I am making good progress.. Vivian, please dont ever stop educating and researching, our lives depend on it… Thanks very much!!!

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Thanks for sharing you incredible story with us and for reinforcing my desire to research osteoporosis and share everything with the community!

      • L.D.

        I forgot to mention that I gave my therapist your site which she expressed interest in. She’s young and professionals like her can assist us better than those with MD etc.,, who are so blind to prevention or natural healing but support Big Pharma… My copy of Save Our Bones is dog eared now from use and sharing with others who just cant afford to buy more than groceries.. We are in this together and I think spreading the word is our best defense and help to “Save Our Bones”

  14. Barbara

    I really enjoyed reading this thread and the success stories of dealing with severe osteoporosis, which I have. It’s refreshing to read; I felt better right away.

  15. Darlene Bartman

    I too was on Fosamax for a number of years until it began affecting me negatively. Thank you for all your good work in educating people again the use of phosphates.

  16. Allison Ifferte

    Hi Vivian Just to let you know my bone scan went from osteoporosis to osteopenia!! My T score between
    -1 and -2.5 SD. So happy, thanks so
    Much for your good work and emails!! May you always be Blessed. Warm wishes, Allison

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Thanks so much for sharing your fantastic improvement with us, Allison! I’m so happy and proud of you… keep up with the Program 🙂

  17. Mary Kay Rudeen

    Hi Vivian, I have a question about egg shells. I was just reading about egg shells having 93% calcium in them, mineral elements and essential amino acids. It said to boil the organic egg shell, use coffee grinder to grind it and take 1/2 tsp a day. 1/2 tsp equals 400-500 mg of calcium. The article was very interesting. Could you please comment on this way to get calcium. I was thinking of incorporating this into my diet. Thank you!

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Well, alchemy or not, it turns out that eggshells are made of inorganic calcium, so I don’t recommend ingesting them. You’re better off taking an organic form of calcium. You can read more about this very important topic here:
      And keep asking questions, Mary Kay!

      • Mary Kay Rudeen

        Thank YOU!!

  18. R G Elmendorf

    To that ‘Bone-Headed’ Chief Windmill-Tilter:

    You tell ’em, Vivian. RGE.

  19. debra

    I’d like to chime in this morning as well. it’s uncanny the manner in which this journey from “diagnosis” to bone health mimics all which has come from your book. i consider the day i stumbled upon you on the internet to be one of the biggest life changing events for me and have referred numerous friends to you. the educational component is paramount and grows from there. many, many thanks

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Thanks so much for your kind words, Debra, Indeed, knowledge IS power 🙂

  20. Denise Lindell

    After following the Saves Our Bones Program for a few years, I am happy to say that my bone scans have shown improvement. After all the research I have done I can’t imagine taking any of the medications that are being prescribed for osteoporosis. I was surprised by an article that I recently read about acidifying and alkalizing foods. This article stated that all fruits, except lemons and limes are acid forming. This confused me, since the Save Our Bones program lists most fruits in the alkalizing category. Could you please clear this up for me? I want to thank you for your dedication to helping people tackle their bone health issues in a natural way.

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Congratulations on your DEXA scan improvement and glad to have you in the community, Denise! Rest assured that the list for alkalizing and acidifying foods in the Osteoporosis Reversal Program is based on the most current scientific data for determining the pH of foods. In fact, most fruits are alkalizing, with very few exceptions.

  21. nancy hughes

    Thanks Vivian for keeping me on track.Iwas diagnosed with -3.9 T -score and last year it had reduced to -2.4 so I’m hoping by my next dexa scan next year it will have
    gone.You are an inspiration to so many.I’m so glad I decided to come off Actonel and keep striving for more improvement.I have found almond milk and drink fruit teas as well as following your advice on food.

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Wonderful news, Nancy! May your bone density continue to increase this year and beyond!

      • Betty

        I have looked at many containers of almond milk and found them to have calcium carbonate which is not the most absorbable form. What brand do you recommend Vivian?

  22. Linda

    I was basically made to feel like I knew nothing when I refused HRT’s and osteoporosis drugs from my OB dr. Basically I was eventually told that she
    didn’t need to see me anymore as my primary care dr. would take care of me from now on. Sad but that’s life these days. Take control of your own health. THANK YOU for what you are doing….

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      That was very brave of you, Linda!

  23. Pearl

    Thanks Vivian,
    That is probably another reason I have it then, I have spent many years extreemly stressed in an abusive relationship.
    I have not been stressed at all though about going on your program, I felt it was just “right” somehow, & I also do meditation now which is good for me.

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Recovering from abuse can be a difficult journey, but also a very enlightening one. I am so glad you’re moving forward, Pearl, and that Save Our Bones could be a part of it!

  24. Lynne

    Hi Vivian, I wanted to share with you, and to reaffirm that your influence and confidence in your work does have positive consequences. Cannot remember when I exactly I bought your book (early 2000s) but have consistently read all your follow up emails with advise and hints, down loading many of them for reference. Back in 2001 after a MRI bone density scan a I was diagnosed with osteoporosis and osteoarthritis and began a path of fosamax, actonal, and others! All of which made me very sick! Diet, exercise, your knowledge, no medications, and a desire to control my own health has resulted in a MRI scan this week which shows mild osteoarthritis from too much heavy work but NO osteoporosis! My thanks for your dedication. Lynne, Australia

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Lynne, yours is an inspiring story – thank you so much for sharing with me and the community! Your experience reminds me yet again of why I wrote the Program, and what I hoped this information would accomplish. Best of luck as you embark on an osteoporosis-free life!

  25. Marilou J. Regacho

    Do you know of doctors in Manila, Philippines who are of same vision as yours and treat osteoporosis cases as you does? If so, can you please supply me names and addresses (hospital or clinics). thank you

  26. Fran Bowen

    Hi. Just a little food for thought. I decided after the Protelos scare to stop all treatment for my osteoporosis apart from my calcium effervescents and Vit D. I went to see the Osteoporosis Nurse at the hospital because she wanted me to try the implant which I was not pleased about (I had already tried all the tablets which gave me migraines) as I dont want anything implanted into me – if it goes wrong and doesnt agree with me then I have to have it taken out and needles are not my best friends!! She was not happy with the amount of literature I took with me from you site and seemed a bit floored by it. She said it was my choice if I didnt want treatment but then started a big down load lecture on how “I must be careful not to break any RIBS!!” I was a bit taken back by this as I didnt think I could so easily break one of them in particular. She said if I broke one to tell her immediately and they would put me back on treatment. She actually has scared me and now I am wondering if I have done the right thing in refusing treatment??

    • Vivian Goldschmidt, MA

      Fran, you’ve received some great support from Lowana and Pearl! I just wanted to share this post with you to help you understand your doctor’s “scare tactics”:

      Have confidence in your bones, your body, and your health choices!

    • Lowana

      Hi Fran,

      I know two women who have been on bisphosphonates for some years and they have still broken bones, so even if you did break a rib and were not on Protelos what’s the difference?

      • Pearl

        Hi Fran,
        I was diagnosed with osteoporosis a couple years after I got a crushed vertabrae, I ony took one of their tablets and it made me so ill i just told the Doctor I wasn’t having any more, the Doc I had then didn’t argue & just said I would probably just get the same rsults with the rest, so he wouldn’t prescribe them, a few months later I cracked a rib, not sure how, went to the hospital & they just confirmed it was cracked & sent me home, said it will heal by itself.
        I guess it must of, because I’m still going, it does cause a bit of pain occasionally, but not much.

        • Pearl

          sorry, that should read, a couple years “ago”,

          • catherine

            Hi Fran. I to have broken a rib nothing was done was painful to breath at first but went, did it at a swimming complex a high concrete shelf slide lifted myself up but came down onto my left side rib at first did not know what I had done, went to Docs said I had pulled a muscle, but months later had a very large lump round my rib, so went for scan doc said that it was a calcium build up and had just grown, sorry but that proves to me that I had a cracked rib, and although I didn’t know it at the time my bones were probably at the osteoporina level, and that it had mended by itself. I do just have a problem wearing wide belts as they make the rib cage ache underneath. It is just another scare tactic, our bodies are wonderfully designed to heal themselves. So take courage and keep following Vivian’s program. By the way in France they do not prescribe any of the bisphosphonates drugs because they are to dangerous, only high dose vit D, my sister lives there. hopes this helps warm wishes catherine

  27. Crete Sham

    Wise and inspiring words ! Thank you , Vivian. Have a good day! God bless you

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